Thursday, January 31, 2013

I'll never be the blogger who has it all together.

Somedays I wish I was the blogger who had an Erin Condren planner full of ideas and topics to post about. Really, I do. It would make days like today so much easier. However, I've come to the realization that I'll never be that girl, I'll never be that overly organized blogger who has all of her shit together. Maybe that means I need to take this more seriously? I don't really know what it means, I just know that for me I get more inspired by seeing a blank page to start writing my thoughts on than a planner telling me what to do.

I've never enjoyed being bossed around. Even if I'm the one doing the bossing.

Today I have no ideas, no topics, nothing. Today I have this blank page and I'm feeling slightly defeated as far as my blog goes. I don't know where the feelings of defeat are stemming from but sometimes they take over and I like to think it's what helps me to get more creative and start thinking a little harder. These are the days I think feeling defeated is a good thing. Kind of like the defeat is the foot to kick my creativity's ass in gear, if you will.

I really don't think feeling defeated is a bad thing, in this case at least. This feeling makes me want to work harder to be better, to reach higher. Not to say that I'm going to start writing in my glorified paperweight planner, because I'd be lying to myself if I wrote that here right now, but I think it's time for the creative juices to start brewing a little hotter.

It's so easy to get burned out when you do this 5+ days a week and it's even easier to turn down a path of things that aren't necessarily on the road you initially wanted your blog to be. We have to challenge ourselves when we feel defeat, that's how we get over the humps and get stronger, I think.

I'll never be the blogger who has it all together. 
That means there will be days I get defeated and days I sit here and ramble to a blank screen, it all means I have to work harder. 
I'm okay with that.
And that's all I've got today.

Wednesday, January 30, 2013

Whitney's What the? Wednesday

It's Wednesday and not only does that mean it's your favorite day of the week to think dirty things about, it also means it's time for me to pretend I'm a celebrity gossip blogger.


Let's start today off the same way we ended last week.
Lindsay Lohan. Poor, poor little LiLo isn't feeling very well this week, it seems she has a little upper respiratory infection. Which, I imagine, is multiplied as a result of her chain smoking tendencies, though I'm no doctor so what do I really know?
LiLo has a mandatory court date scheduled for today and her attorney tried to use the oldest trick in the book to get her out of it. Unfortunately Mr. Judgey Pants says doctor's notes are bologna sandwiches and LiLo best get her contaminated ass there today or she's going straight to jail. 
Do not pass Go, do not collect $200.


Recently there have been a few rumors spreading that the Bootylicious Diva herself, Beyonce, has been a complete horror during the preparations for the Super Bowl halftime show she is set to star in. Reports say she's been demanding, difficult and basically a total headache. One of the demands being that her child's on set nursery needs to be exactly 26 degrees celsius. Ooookay. 
I don't know why this is even news, really... the woman's nickname is Sasha Fierce or some shit like that. OF COURSE she's a diva. See also: She's Beyonce and I'm pretty sure that means she can do just about whatever the eff she wants to. 
Like name her child after a primary color and a plant. 


Miley and Liam are, hands down, my favorite Hollywood couple ever. Mostly because of my love for Miley which runs as deep as the ocean. Anyways, there have been speculations that the two have tied the knot finally but according to both of them this is all false.
I just wish they would get this show on the road. I need to see what kind of dress Miley wears. And how sexy Liam looks in a tux.
Will she go as Hannah or Miley?


Probably the most comical report of the week goes to none other than Justin Beaver. Errrr, Bieber. Beaver rolls off the tongue better, no? Yes. Anyways, the Beaver was recently photographed completely groping a fan's boob and I can't even handle how awkward it is. What's even more awkward is that his reps are trying to say that is isn't a boob grab we're seeing. Now, I may not have the best vision in the world but come on, that's total hand on boob action, no?
Eat your heart out, Seleney.


Lastly, things about about to get reaaaal creepy thanks to one Hulk Hogan. It's no secret that the king creeper himself has a very, very strange obsession with his daughter but this week he may have taken it to a new level via Twitter...
"Brooke's legs"... Hoookay, creep nasty. 
I feel the dirty shivers just thinking about this one.


And that's it for this week. Who's excited for day drinking Super Bowl Sunday this weekend?

PS. I am posting some of my life lessons over at my bestical, Ty Ty's, blog today. Go check those bad boys out! 

Tuesday, January 29, 2013

We're all a bunch of habitual freaks.

Raise your hand if you really thought I was never coming back today? Whoops. This late post is a total coincidence  Or maybe I just know myself a little too well...


I am a creature of habit in every way, shape, and form, which I learned many of you are from all of your Facts of Me linkups. We're all a bunch of habitual freaks and I'm totally content with that.

Currently I'm sitting here chowing down on some Chick-n-Minis from Chickfila and sipping on an iced coffee made me yours truly, moi. Throw in some casual blog reading, Instagram roaming, stalking tweets from the wee hours of the night and you've got my typical morning routine. So, the Chickfila part might not actually be every morning, I think we've established that I'm a self proclaimed budget diva, but if I could squeeze it in there every morning (which would probably cause me to no long be able to squeeze in my pants... yoga or any other type) I'd do it.

Get to the point already, right? Well, I don't know that I really have a point. I just, kind of, wanted to make a list of the current things I can't seem to shake.


As I mentioned, I can't get enough of Chickfila's Chick-n-Minis. Why are they so delicious? I simply can't explain. All I can tell you is that they are the greatest $2.40 I can spend in one day.
If you follow me on Twitter or Instagram you already know this one. Bagel Bites. Can't. Get. Enough. I don't know what it is about them. Maybe it's that you when pizza's on a bagel you can have pizza anytime? Maybe it's the delightful crispy crunch from cooking them (properly) in the oven? Either way, they are my vice. I may need rehab eventually. 

One of my sweet Twit friends turned me onto Folgers' Vanilla Biscotti K-cups and I'm never looking back. Ever. I've found myself brewing these sweet pods of joy at the most random times. Always over ice though. Because I'm Floridian and hot anything almost never sounds appealing.
Unless it's fresh Bagel Bites out of the oven, of course. 
I've been brewing this coffee over ice, mixing with 1 Splenda and some flavored creamer. DELISH.


Slow your roll, Whitty. All you have to talk about right now is food and beverage addictions?
(woah, did I just talk to myself?)

Let's talk about how I can't get over how Biolage makes my hair smell like a fresh garden in heaven. I've been using this for a few weeks now and I'm already hesitant of running out (because I'm crazy and hate finishing products, you know). I don't know why or how, but I wouldn't mind bathing in this stuff.


Turns out, I'm also capable of obsessing over things that I want.

Enter: Tervis Water Bottle.
I am pining for these more than I pined for shaving my legs for the first time (I can't be the only one who was excited about that?). The budget diva inside of me continues to tell me that they are too expensive but I find myself browsing any and every online store that sells Tervis, waiting for the deal of a lifetime to strike me.
Really though, it pains me how much I am dying for one of these babies.

Lastly, my Erin Condren Planner that helps me plan out all of my blog posts and countless meetings.
NOT!
How many of you knew this one was a big fat lie?
Considering it's 11:30 and I've yet to post for the day, I think we all know my 2013 Erin Condren planner is currently collecting dust on my desk at home. I should have spent those doll hairz on a damn Tervis water bottle.


And that's all I've got for you today. I really should try and get addicted to the EC planner thing so I can avoid these awkwardly thrown together posts, huh?
See ya!

Monday, January 28, 2013

4 bottles of Jack in my boots.

Hey there. I guess I should start this out by saying that not only is one of my very besticals probably never coming back to blogging, but I probably won't either.

Go here to read about why my girl Samilicious won't be returning to blog-ville.

Now, as far as my story goes? Allow me to paint a vivid picture of my weekend for you.
It started as innocent as a Saturday could be. And by innocent I mean purchasing enough Jack Daniels for Luke Bryan's entire tour bus. And by entire tour bus I mean just me and him.
Oh, and Fireball. Because it's not a Saturday without shots of Fireball.

I put on my favorite plaid shirt and boots, shoved as many mini liquor bottles in them as I could fit, and headed out to what I thought was just an innocent night at a country concert. You know, day drinking, singing at the top of my lungs and the most carefree dancing one can perform in a public setting.

I may or may not have tried to figure out ways to sneak the dogs to the concert with me.

Fun fact: I can successfully fit 4 mini bottles of Jack Daniels in my boots.

On the way to the concert I ran in to my sweet friend Kate and we took some shots of Fireball Whiskey. Standard. For both of us.

I was feeling pretty good, just making my way to the show, when I ran in to a man who looked a lot like Luke Bryan. He had the brightest white smile, his hair was just perfect and I swear his accent resembled what I imagine angels sound like. He asked me if I was headed to the show to which I looked up and down at my outfit and clearly told him of course I was.

Turns out, the sexy Luke Bryan look-a-like wasn't a look-a-like, he was the actual Luke Bryan and once he smelled the Fireball whiskey on me he invited me to his tour bus. He ended up canceling his set that night to spend the rest of the evening with me and it was like a dream.

The next morning I woke up in his tour bus (oops... hey, you would have too.). When I opened my eyes that sexy country man was on one knee and said some of the sweetest words to me. Before I knew it I had a ring on my finger and was doodling Mrs. Whitney Bryan on a leftover bar receipt I found in my purse. I didn't even care if I still had my debt card or what the tabs from the night before equated to. My life was officially changed forever.

Sunday afternoon we had our engagement photos taken. I think they turned out phenomenally. What do you think?
It really was such a great weekend and trust me, I'm just as in shock as you all are. Like I said, I'm not sure if continuing this blogging thing is in my cards... Lukey (that's my pet name for him) wants me to go on the rest of the tour with him, so you can imagine how busy I'm going to be. Obviously I don't want to abandon my sweet interwebz space but just look at that sexy smile. I can't say no to it, you know?

I really just hope Adam Levine doesn't take this news too badly, I know he's been planning on putting a ring on this for a hot minute now. Obviously Beyonce said it best. If you like it, put a ring on that shit. Sorry, Adam!

Friday, January 25, 2013

Consider me the old dog, it's okay.

It's always an exciting moment when I have some sort of breakthrough, whether it be good or bad, I'm always welcoming the breakthroughs with open arms. The funny thing about personal breakthroughs is that I usually learn things about myself I hadn't yet learned. I'm one of those breeds of human that is typically really intrigued when I'm given the rare opportunity to learn something new about myself, kind of like when an old dog learns new tricks. Consider me the old dog, it's okay.

Last night over text with one of my more wise friends and typically my voice of reason, Ty Ty sparkleface, I realized something new about myself; The little moments are my cup of tea. Not to sound completely cliche and like a big ass broken record, but the little things completely rock.
Sitting in my apartment.
So simple. So easy. I have the keys, I open the door when I get home, I change in to some sweatpants, bing bang boom happiness. The sweatpants part has to be my favorite part though. There are simply to words for the bliss that is changing out of the clothes I've been stuck in for somewhere around 9 hours and into big, baggy sweatpants fit for McHammer.
I pour myself some Chardonnay over ice, I love this part of my day.
This part of the day is also what convinces me it's time to pay my bills. The Cardbordeaux helps cushion the burn.
When I come back from changing into sweatpants and pouring my wine, Ella looks like she's getting some work done on the laptop. That's funny to me. Really funny. 
What if she has some K9 companions on the interwebz that she, too, chats with daily while I'm at work? 

Sebby is probably too uneducated to figure out the computers in the place. Wouldn't shock me. It's okay though, he's my special boy.
Recently I've been told that coating my face in the same liquid I coat my frying pan in when sauteing vegetables could be beneficial to my skin. So being the gullible blogger that I am, I follow suit.
In my Heart concert t-shirt. Collecting concert t-shirts is kind of my thing.
I still can't confirm if covering my face in Rachel Ray's favorite ingredient is actually effective but the dogs really want to lick my face clean.
I love when Sebby blankly stares at me.
I know it's blank. I wouldn't be surprised if he has actual rocks for brains.
I still love him more than life. Especially that precious, blank stare.

He got us stuck in a bush this morning. While the cute neighbor guy with a poodle watched. Thanks, Sebby.
My Scentsy warmer is creating a heart shape on my wall. I love hearts.
This fascinates me.
The scent Rio Beach has my entire apartment smelling like a scene from Laguna Beach. I loved that show. I love this scent. It's out of this world.
I walk to my bed and realize that I have an entire king sized bed, yet it appears that I only utilize half of it. Very strange that I typically start the night with pillows in their classic positions and, some how, along the duration of the night they end up hugging all around me. Like a nest. A pillow nest.
Yes, that is my face on a blanket. Ella's on it too. I'll show you all one day.
(Non-dog people, don't have me committed. It was a gift.)

Happy Friday, love bunnies.

Thursday, January 24, 2013

I'd date me.

Every Wednesday night there's a food truck pod that happens right around the corner from my apartment complex, complete with 6 different trucks ranging from cupcakes to Korean tacos. I'd like to say I frequent the hipster gathering a lot more than I do but really, overpriced fried food served out of something that resembles the camper Uncle Si won that one time just isn't always appealing to me.

Last night, however, I had a lady date with one of my friends to attend the fried food on wheels gathering, so I prepped my cholesterol levels all day and hoped for the best. Unfortunately, or maybe fortunately for my health's sake, my friend bailed on me last minute and I was left with a growling, pissed off stomach that was still trying to decipher why I had been light on the caloric intake all day.

I had my feet propped up on my ottoman and a cold beer in my hand when I started roaming Instagram, you know, the norm. It was about 5 minutes in, after scrolling through what seemed like 85 dinner hubby made me photos when I realized I didn't need to cancel my food truck date just because my friend cancelled. It was a gorgeous night and dammit I can take my own happy ass around the lake for that burger I had been lusting for all day long.

And that is exactly what I did. 
Accompanied by my 2 favorite furry dates, of course.
 
It was strangely peaceful walking around the lake, burger, cupcake, and dogs a tow. I was able to actually enjoy alone time, which isn't something I'm accustomed to doing. Maybe I'm not so bad after all.

I brought my foil wrapped greasy food back to my apartment, put my favorite slippers on, and sipped on a beer while watching the same Sex and the City reruns I've seen 50 times. I couldn't help but continue asking myself why I don't do this for myself more often?
I'm totally dateable!

I don't really know where I'm going with this, I just felt a sense of strange peace come over me after my grease binge last night. I also slept through the entire night without waking up, which happens about as often as June Boo Boo takes a shower. Maybe it was the nearly 1,000 calories I took in at one sitting, but I don't think so, I think I was just relaxed.
I've got to do this more often.

Wednesday, January 23, 2013

Whitney's What the? Wednesday

I can hardly handle how many of you stopped by yesterday to linkup your fun facts. Fun doesn't even begin to describe how yesterday was for me on this blog. So, for that I thank you all soo much for linking up. Really, seeing so many amazing blogging ladies connecting with one another on a positive level was just so surreal. What a day!

Today I'm staying true to my new Wednesday series, so let's see what's been going on in the celeb gossip world this week, shall we?


If you've been living under a rock you probably wont see this first one coming. If you have any access to any type of social network, radio or TV station, you probably called it.
Ohhh, Manti T'eo, or as I've been calling him, Manatee Potato.
Manatee Potato; Notre Dame rockstar and imaginary friend advocate.
Homie, was on top of his game, literally, until something even worse than your team getting their ass handed to them by a team far superior happened... Not only was it blatantly proven that his team was, in fact, nowhere near good enough to be considered the #1 college football team, we all found out that Manatee has been rocking a fake girlfriend.
While I personally gave my imaginary companions up somewhere during the time I started growing adult teeth, who am I to judge? Perhaps Mr. Potato is just a really, really late bloomer. 
Or nucking futs.


The presidential inauguration happened on Monday afternoon. As always a slew of the who's who was in attendance, including one Bill Clinton
Oh Willie Clinton, some things never change. While I'm sure Ms. Clarkson has a Hollywood grade ass, I'd imagine after all of these years you would have perfected your sneaky glance by now. What would Hilary say? You're right, she probably does believe you thought you saw a clown. I forget you're a veteran in all things adultery.
The good news is that it wasn't Beyonce's ass you laid those eyes on. Something tells me JayZ knows people.


A few months ago the youngest prince of Whales, Prince Harry, found himself in America's most dangerous city for a single man. A one Sin City, or Vegas if you are completely oblivious. He managed to commit many sins during his visit to Sin City, shaming his entire royal family and further confirming the lack of morals in Americans.
Well, this week Hare Hare came forward and spoke publicly about his Vegas night. It turns out sweet, innocent Hare has a horrible judge of character. He claims he thought he could trust everyone in the hotel room that night.
I mean, what friend would ever sell a story of a prince?
(answer: me)


Selena Gomez and Justin Bieber broke up a few weeks ago and they are not letting us forget it. I can't give them too much crap though, they are doing a hell of a lot better than I did during my first break up. 
At least they're leaving their houses. And showering.
Though I've got to say, this little diva-in-training has started to show signs of a heartbroken teen this passed week when she did a cover of Justin Timberlake's song 'Cry Me A River'. I wont post the video here because, well, I've heard howling cats that sound better than her rendition of said song, but sister is seeking revenge on that ex of hers and I think she got it.
Well, that is if you buy the story that the Biebinator is capable of finding someone better than Seleney to call "baby".


What would a celeb gossip update be without a mention of the Queen of Hot Mess herself, Ms. Lindsay Lohan?
It seems some certifiably insane misinformed employee at Dancing with the Stars, who may or may not be trying to lose their job, has been trying to get CrazyPants Lohan aboard the 2013 cast. She's been offered as much as $550,000 to pretend she's interested in learning ballroom dancing and yet, somehow, her ego remains larger than her failed career.
Apparently CrazyPants is above reality TV and here all along I thought doing heroin and/or owing the government mass amounts of money was an ultimate low.

Hey DWTS, call me.

Tuesday, January 22, 2013

The Facts of Whitty

On Sunday I announced that today was going to be hosting a one time only linkup and today is the day! 
Let's hope it's not a major fail. (fact - I'm pretty self conscience like that)
I'm a very nosey blog reader, admittedly. I'm the blog reader who sees an 'about me' page and immediately clicks it before I even read the initial post. When I see a blogger do the occasional "catch up" about me post, my heart fluffs up and I hear angels sing.

In attempts to get more acquainted with my readers I thought it would be really fun to have an about me type of linkup, so here we are...

Let's talk about facts, baby!


Fact - I love hot sauce. Crystal hot sauce, to be specific. 
Though I prefer to call it cristal, like the fancy champagne.
If it was socially acceptable I would carry a bottle in my purse. Unfortunately TSA wasn't too amused last time I tried to get through security with hot sauce in my carry-on.

Fact - My hair is naturally curly. And I hate it.
Not to say I don't love curling my hair, obviously, but my natural curls are out of control and don't listen to a thing I have to say to them.
It's even worse when I blow-dry it.
Unfortunate, really. 
Also, sometimes I send my friends photos like this.

Fact - I was adopted by my dad. When I was 7, to be exact.
My mom is my biological mom and she is kind of a saint.

Fact - I'm a nail biter. And yes, I know that it's gross and really germy.
If you try to explain how gross it is to me I will only tune you out, I guarantee you won't be telling me anything my grandmother hasn't already tried telling me for the last 20+ years.
I'm an anxiety stricken woman, it's what I do.  

Fact - I hate vegetables. Mostly the green ones.
I love corn, peas, and green beans. That's about it. Brussel sprouts and asparagus are my ideas of torture by food. Even covered in hot sauce, they still suck.
My dad used to force me to sit at the table until my brussel sprouts were gone... Luckily we had a German Shepard who would eat anything covered in meat sauce. Thanks, buddy.

Fact - I drink just about everything from a straw. Even wine.
Drinking from a straw makes everything better. Also, I once heard it makes you get drunk faster. So, there's that.
Sometimes I also drink water from a wine glass.
Just call me Nene Leakes.

Fact - I picked up a bobby pin off of my bathroom floor and put it in my hair yesterday.
Lord knows how long that little bobby had been on the floor.
What can I say? I'm dripping in class.

Fact - Potatoes are my favorite. Sweet potatoes are a disgrace.
The fact that these two are in the same family blows my mind. In a bad way.

Fact - I'll do anything for my friends. I'm insanely bias.
If you hurt or gang up on one of my best friends there's a good chance I'll be standing right behind them feeling equally as hurt and/or pissed.

Fact - Speaking of being hurt and/or pissed, I'm a grudge holder.
I've been that way for 25 years and I'm pretty sure it'll never change.

Fact - I have really weird hips. They make the craziest popping noises.
It freaks most of my friends out. I kind of love popping them though. Sorry I'm not sorry.
I'm pretty sure it's from years of competitive dance.
I was also forced to be a tap dancing hippo once. Scarred for life.
All I wanted was to be the teddy bear. I still hate the bia that got that costume. (see? grudge holder)

Fact - I have big monster feet. Size 9's.
Don't be offended that I called them monster feet if you have 9's or bigger.
Big feet, big foundation.

Fact - I'm a song and movie repeat offender. Over and over and over, it's the name of my game.
It takes a lot to get me to grow tired of a favorite movie or song.
When I'm on a kick with a song or a movie, watch out, it isn't going anywhere any time soon.

Fact - Doing laundry hurts me. However there are no words for how much I love a clean kitchen.
I would rather clean the kitchen of a frat house than do 1 load of laundry.

Fact - I used to be a child actress/model. Real life, I was.
I used to do work for Disney, Nickelodeon (when they were stationed here in Orlando), and lots of other smaller companies. It was fun but the best part was that I once met Aaron Carter and got to do a bit with him for Big Help Day on Nick. I thought my life was complete. No, I knew it was complete.
Don't worry kid, we're going to make it big one day.

Fact - Braces ruined said acting/modeling career.
Womp womp.
But I guess it's cool that I have straight teeth now. Fame would have been cooler though.
You know, because I was definitely going to hit it big time and be a star. Stay tuned.
Eff you, braces.

Fact - I go through major food phases. Like a small child.
I'll eat Bagel Bites every single day for the next 3 months. Then we will have a dramatic, soap opera like, breakup and I will be done with them for a long time.

Fact - I ended up at Florida State because of my high school sweetheart. Who later slayed my fragile little teenage heart.
Yep, it's true. I moved for a damn dude.
And people wonder why I'm such a cold hearted little bizzle now. You're welcome for this insight.

Fact - I hate finishing the last of products. My shower is full of bottles with just 1 or 2 uses left in them.
It's a real issue. I am a freak.

Fact - I got the idea for this linkup when I was in the shower. I also got the idea for this blog and blog name in the shower.
Apparently I think a lot when I'm showering.


So, what are your fun facts?
The Facts of Me

Monday, January 21, 2013

The day I attempted to be a fashion blogger.

Recently I was the given the opportunity to learn about The Shine Project which is not only a blog but also a company ran by a beautiful (no really, she's absolutely stunning) woman by the name of Ashley. The Shine Project is a company who employs at risk youth in America, to help them go to college. Let me tell you, these kids make some of the most beautiful pieces of jewelry. These kids have got some serious skills!

When I loaded the store's online shop I was completely floored. Not only is this an amazing company but the jewelry was gorgeous, I couldn't believe kids in high school were making them. To say I was having trouble picking out my favorite pieces would be a vast understatement, I wanted one of everything for me and every single one of my girl friends.

Once I made my choices and let it all sink in, I realized this would be the greatest excuse ever to pretend to be a fashion blogger for a day. So, my beauties arrived, I put some paint on the barn, got some help from a sweet man companion, and did the fashion blogger thing. Unfortunately I've yet to nail down the classic look away pose. Baby steps, guys, baby steps. 

 Fashion blogger, I am not. We all know this. Ashley must be a little crazy but hey, I'm a lot crazy, so let's roll with it.
[Dress & Ring: Forever 21, Shoes: Target, Watch: Michael Kors, iPhone Case: Casemate]

I can not wait to order myself a few more items from The Shine Project store, I've got my eye on enough items to suck up half a paycheck. I don't mind breaking my budget diva lifestyle for this company because it's a purchase I can feel good about.

What are some of your favorite items from The Shine Project store?
If you found a couple of things you couldn't decide between I have a surprise for you:
Use the code 'Valentines' and get an item for free when you buy 2!


Oh, and for those of you here to see me fall flat on my face as a fashion blogger...


Don't forget to linkup with me tomorrow and share your fun facts!