Wednesday, February 6, 2013

Whitney's What The ? Wednesday

Why hi, little bunnies!  While poor Miss Whitty is currently battling the plague, you're stuck with a couple of us trying to play substitute teacher.  Don't worry, though, we'll let you color during science and play Heads Up Seven Up, so really we aren't that bad.

Soooo. I guess I'll get 'er going with your first sub!  
I'm Tyler from Arkansassy.  Being a down-home country gal, I love nothing more than seeing some country singers making headlines.
But LeAnn, LeAnn, LeAnn ... you're just never gonna hear the end of this.
Brandi Glanville came out swinging this week, telling Radar Online how and when she learned of their affair.  Which basically consists of Eddie, Brandi, LeAnn and Dean going to dinner and then watching LeAnn and Eddie try to lick each others' ears all night.
Which I'm not buying.
I'm having a hard time reconciling my love of country with my love of ROOBH because they just can't coexist.  In this situation  you just gotta pick and side, and sorry y'all - crazy Brandi has me siding with the adulteress. 
Team LeLe.
Their kinds of crazy don't even match up, guys.

NOW ... I might feel a little more sympathy for Team Brandi had she done all this, I don't know ... when it was happening.  When the wounds were fresh and she was reacting out of passion and anger.
But no, years later, she still feels the need to talk about it.  Brandi's kids are old enough to be hearing all the crap she talks on Daddy and Step-Skeletor, and if she keeps it up, those kids are gonna end up going on a heroin/ therapy bender before it's all said and done.
And that's really all I have to say about that.

Oh hey guys, Sami's Shenanigans here. I about fell out of my chair on Sunday when I heard that JT himself decided call out my girl Brit at a concert in New Orleans on Saturday. Before singing my personal fave ballad Cry Me a River, he said "Sometimes in life you think you found the one. But then one day you might find out she is just some bitch!". For those of you that are not super fans like myself, you might have forgotten that that particular song has always been rumored to be about the celebrity couple's tumultuous break-up. Justin Timberlake later backtracked and tried to laugh it off on Twitter, but it was too late. You don't go smack talking the Brit Brit and then expect to get away it.

Jokes on you bro, because turns out that after making a smooth $15 million on X Factor, Miss Britney Spears is moving on to bigger and better things.. like a show at one of the Caesars casinos in Las Vegas. Some bitch, Mr. Suit and Tie? Try the RICH BITCH ala Nene Leakes. Somehow I don't think Jessica Biel is making that kind of cash starring in one movie every three years. Brit Brit for the win!

Chris Breezy is just sleazy.
While Whit is sick I thought I would talk about a real sicko: Chris Brown. And by I, I mean Helene. (HI!) 
I used to like Chris Brown. Scratch that, love. I know, I know. But the kid can flat out dance. And some of his jams just get me in the mood. 
Welp. He's at his crazy ways again. If you haven't heard already, he got into a fight with Frank Ocean at a parking lot outside of a recording studio. He claims his innocence. Frank says differently.

I mean who would you root for? The fresh prince of Bel Air (Ocean) on the Left or the scary hood-wearing neck tat having guy on the right?
Not only is Breezy sporting a hand cast, it just came out he called (bisexual) Ocean a "f*ggot"." 
Let me get this straight Chris: You beat up Rihanna, Trashed the Today Show, dressed as a Terrorist for Halloween, and now you're beating up someone else and showing your homophobe colors? 
If it couldn't get any worse- it was just announced he faked documents showing that he completed his community service he was ordered to do after the Rihanna beating. 
Looks like you might need to go on hiatus. (Best dancer ever or not). Maybe go to the jungle where you can pick on some cats you're own size. 
Or get eaten.

Hi, it's Alexa!

Oh, Bar, Bar, Bar, Bar, Bar. And I'm not talking about the little thing I like to cozy up to during happy hour. What the ? has Bar Refaeli's life come to that she's stooped to GoDaddy standards of wannabe-titillating Super Bowl commercials? 
Did her ladybags deflate? Did her golden glow wear off? Did her eyes lose their Come hither sparkle?
I'll take OH HAAAAALE TO THE NAAAAAH for $1.3 million, Mr. Trebek.
So what was she thinking pulling out that sick, sloppy, slobbery kiss on national TV during the Super freaking Bowl? Bar, I know you're no stranger to media questions ~ Are you and Leo on again? Are you just friends? Just how hot is y'all's bedroom? {Inappropriate, perhaps. Vital to humanity's existence, definitely.} ~ but we were beginning to think you're a stranger to PDA. Welp, consider our curiosity satisfied, sistafriend! Even though we'll never get the sound effects of this snippet out of our minds, since we now know you're into the smoochin' bizz, can you at least pull this slop with sexy Leo next time?
Otherwise, your legacy will forever be relegated to what I've deemed NoDaddy, or StopDaddy, or ForTheLoveOfGodMyEarsBurrrrrrrn!

Hey, just be glad a picked the pre-Mononucleosis-transfer picture.

Hi Y'all, I'm Brooke and what better way to break in this special edition of What The ? Wednesday than to share with you some extra-special news.

The big news of the week isn't that Kimye may be getting married soon...I think you have to be divorced for that to happen, but rather they've picked out a name for their soon-to-be bundle of joy.

They wanted something original and something that they loved - so why not Liv?

As it turns out, it's also one of their most favorite nightclubs in Miami and also where Kimye celebrated Halloween. I guess, maybe, it's full of memories. Maybe it has some significance or maybe they just serve up a really cold bottle of Cristal.  I've been there and while I don't quite think it's baby-naming worthy, I do see why it is their fave.  Original? Eh. Crazy? You got it.

Anndddd that's it for the week.  I don't think we did so bad, right?


  1. As annoying as Brandi is on RHOBH I can't bring myself to be on Lele's team. I can't side with the other woman, espically with kids involved. But Brandi makes it hard for me to stick with her - she's nuts.

  2. I am totally team Brandi. I love her. I agree she is a bit ridiculous and she shouldn't be saying as much as she is about her ex, but you know it's all for publicity. Not so great for her children, but I guess since she is "so poor" she needs to get press and sell stories! ha

  3. Oh this made me laugh! Just what I needed this morning! I agree that Brandi is off her rocker - and I was always a HUGE LeAnn fan (pre-skeletor & affair)... I may (almost) have to go with Brandi on that one. I love how 'in your face' she is on RHOBH!
    Shame on Justin for his comments - seriously, hasn't Brit Brit been through enough!
    Bar & Chris Brown & Kim+Kanye just make me want to vomit. That commercial was SO UNCOMFORTABLE to watch. Chris Brown's 5 minutes of fame are up - they were up the minute he decided it was ok to beat Rihanna and I'm so over Kim&Kanye - ugh.

    Happy Wednesday!!


  4. This is the best post I've ever read! Y'all are hilarious! Get well soon, Whitney!!

  5. Feel better Whitney! (Maybe go sneeze on Chris Brown while you're at it? Put him on bedrest for a while...)

  6. Justin and Britney, I was so obsessed. Thank you for using the denim outfit photo, its a personal fave of mine!

  7. Team Brandi, for sure! I also think Britney is having the better week, can't wait for Vegas, seriously!

  8. I cannot stand Chris Brown. At all. I'm on Team Brandi, but I think they are both cray. And Justin better STFU because, yeah, it's Britney BICTH. I need her to get to Vegas like now so I can go there and see her! And gamble.

    Ramblings of a Suburban Mom

  9. I am team neither because they're both crazy and stupid.
    Eh, Britney and Justin are both past their prime famousness.
    I cannot believe that anybody is still a fan of Chris Brown. I really don't think I could be friends with them.
    Go Daddy has the WORST commercials. I wasn't sure who Bar Rafaeli was before hand (I knew the name though) and really don't care who she is now.
    At least Liv is a real name (Liv Tyler, anyone?) whether they got it from a club or not.
    Whitney! Hope you feel better soon!!!

  10. Feel better soon, Whitney!
    Team LeLe all the way. Surgery on the hoo-ha? What the What? I feel so bad for her kids!

    Thank you bunches ladies for making me laugh today!

  11. LOVED this! So many of my favorite bloggers in one place, how could I not.

    I think the commercial would have been a little better if it wasn't for the sound. CRINGING.

  12. Feel better Whitney!

    And had no idea about Britney's show in Vegas, I NEED to go.

  13. Love you guyzzzz. I want to set Chris Brown loose on JT. LAY OFF MY GIRL BRITNEY!

  14. So sweet that y'all jumped in for Whit-Whit today! Feel better soooon.

  15. As much of a pot-stirrer and potty mouth Brandi is, I just can't side with Leean at all. And LOL at skeletor! Couldn't have said it better myself, and how weird is it that she is trying so hard to look just like Brandi. Unless there's some sort of plastic surgery to make her grow like a foot taller, it'll never happen!

    And *gag* at Kim and Kanye they both absolutely disgust me. Can NOT wait for her long drawn out 15 minutes to be over!

    Happy Hump Day!

  16. Gahh I love me some JT but I pick Britney, JT is the one that married a man.
    And wait I thought Helene was the best dancer ever?

  17. OMG! I can't believe Justin said that about Brit Brit! NOT ok!!!

  18. oh, Whit Whit, feel better lady!
    But I love the guest stars of this post. But I have to say that I'm team RHOBH and Brit Brit all the way. And I hope that Chris Brown disappears forever.

  19. Ahhhh I'm so team Brandi! She is just stirring the pot right now because her book comes out next week and needs some publicity for it. She said after the book comes out shes done talking about LeAnne - thank goodness because I do feel bad for the children!

    Chris Brown needs to gooooooo.

  20. Whit feel betttttter!
    ALSO. I am so over Brandi..
    and Brit.
    and in Chris.


  21. BOO LeAann! BOO Chris Brown! Get well Whitney!

  22. I have just known your blog, it is really fantastic! I follow you, I would like you to follow me!

  23. I'm team Brandi but that caption you wrote made me die laughing!

  24. I love all the guest posters today! Hope you feel better soon, Whitney!


  25. This is freaking hilarious. The end. I'm still laughing!

    XO Jenna

  26. I'm willing to bet that Kim and Kanye are naming their kid LIV because that's where they made the baby in the first place ;) Club Bathrooms, nothing but class for these two ass hats!

  27. hahahahaha This is AWESOME!! You're hilarious, my friend! So glad I stumbled across your blog...

  28. Funny stuff!! BTW thought you would think it funny that your blog is blacklisted. I tried to get on to read the other day at work (an elementary school) on my iPad and it came up that your blog was blocked. I read the reason why and it said PORN. Haha